Wednesday, February 02, 2005

No, you're still from Auburn

The Auburn Plainsman turns unintentional comedy into a front-page art form this week with its hypothesis that -- get this -- the university's 13-0 football season will give Auburn students a leg up on other employment seekers.

As a lifelong, diehard Alabama Crimson Tide fan, I know I have to cut attendees of the Alabama Polytechnic Institute a little slack from time to time, but that rule only applies when the folks on the Plains do or say things with any connection whatsoever to reality. So here's the deal, Tigers: Yes, you will be hired if you're the best fit for the niche the company is looking to fill. No, you won't be hired because Cadillac Williams and Ronnie Brown are first-round NFL draft prospects. Sorry if I shattered any dreams there.

Auburn fans, if you're reading, please do something to stop this kind of madness. It just doesn't reflect well.